It's meant to get better, but now everything is worse
by orsumfenix
Summary: Stuff was meant to get better once they'd won, but for the Garde, stuff actually goes wrong. You may think that everything'll be fixed, but they are just replaced by something. They are replaced by...emptiness and uncertainty. -COMPLETE-
1. 1 I may be out of the darkness

_**I just wanted to write this. A bit depressing, but please REVIEW!**_

_**Full Chapter Title; I may be out of the darkness, but I lost a part of me along the way. **_

**Stuff was meant to get better once they'd won, but for the Garde, stuff actually goes wrong. For one of them, it feels like she's hollow inside. There's an emptiness in Five's heart and she hates it. **

Things are better now, but they still aren't what they used to be.

For instance, all the Garde survived the war, stopped being hunted, and decided to settle down on Earth. The Mogodorians aren't hunting them anymore, the government trusts them and they don't have to hide all the time.

But, good as Earth is, it's not Lorien. They can't go home because their ship was destroyed in the final battle by Setrakus Ra. They can't live the way they used to, and all their families and Cepan are dead.

She's lost and confused without Juanna, who was so dear to her. She's been like that ever since her mother-figure died, but it's been so much lately, when she knows that the others are gone too and none of them can even remember most of their native language.

Don't get her wrong, Earth is good, but it's not really her home. It's alien – full of people without powers that are slowly killing their planet. Humans are loud and sweaty and intolerable and just so _impure_. But this isn't their fault – it's Five's for judging them so harshly.

After all, Lorien was like that once.

But that was different and Five knows it. The Loric never had the greed the human race does, the need for violence, the blood-lust. Earth isn't the ideal world for her, but they're stuck there now.

Thing is, the war, it changed her. Being taken to the brink of death so many times, accepting that it's her time to go, only to be jolted back from the calm and the quiet to hear screaming and feel pain and see John or Marina smiling down at her, as if they've just done a good thing.

Sometimes she can swear she was already gone, and that they tore her soul from the afterlife and left part of her behind.

Because, really, she was brought up by Juanna to believe that, in the battlefield, emotions get you killed. She was always allowed to have them, but not make an emotional attachment to anyone. She hasn't felt for years, and now that she can without being killed, it's almost as if she isn't able to.

She knows that she can feel _some _things. She feels something for Nine, even though she's not entirely sure what it is. Something inside of her clicked when she first met him, and she gets a strange feeling in her stomach whenever he's around. Or at least, she used to, before the battle. She's read about this – humans call it love, she remembers that Loric called it Adorai. Either way, she doesn't like it. It was nice when she could feel it, but the feeling's gone now. It's as if it was never there.

Some of the few emotions she can feel are the negative ones; jealously, bitterness, depression…all the ones she doesn't exactly _want _to feel.

Things are better than they were before, but at least then they knew why they stayed together. But now, none of them really know what to do.

This…_uncertainty _is knawing at her from the pit of her stomach. She doesn't know what she's meant to do. It hangs in the air between all them, always an unsaid question that no one has the answer to. The Elders obviously never thought about this – what they were supposed to do once they've won.

Or maybe the Elders just didn't think that they _would _win.

Maybe things aren't better, after all.

Before, at least, they knew that they had to get along to be a proper army, albeit a small one. They had to learn each other's fighting styles, and trust each other with their rough pasts and dodgy legacies. But now it's different. Now that they don't _need _to trust each other, they don't. It makes her wary, that they know all her secrets but she doesn't want them to. And, besides, they might know people's pasts, but they don't really know each other's personalities.

Like, Eight seems like a very happy-go-lucky kind of person, but after the battle he was different, quieter. He's more cautious about things, and tries to pull his weight more. He speaks to them, but his eyes are clouded over with some indistinguishable emotion. He's changed. Or maybe, the happy him was an act the whole time.

Marina and Eight get along with each other, but they're basically the only ones in the whole big house that do.

Six and John argue more often than they laugh, snapping at each other once before it turns into a full-scale shouting match. They scream at each other for hours on end before one of them run out the house. One enters a room, the other leaves. It's like they can't stand the sight of each other anymore. Even a compliment turns into a hundred insults directed at their weak points.

Ella is the worst, in a way. Her childlike innocence is gone. It died with the Mogodorians she had to slaughter. Five notices that her drawings of birds have turned into drawings of death.

Ella yells at them a lot, all of them. First it was because they were all too caught up in each other to notice her, then because they argued too much, then because she said that she wasn't welcome there, then because they treated her like a baby, then because she was only ever needed for communication.

Marina snapped at that. She'd yelled back that she _had _cared for once, before she became a selfish brat. Then they'd all started arguing of what they were to each other. Marina said she was just a failsafe for if they got hurt. Nine said he was just a soldier. Six had turned on John, claiming she was only ever a replacement for Sarah. They'd started screaming at each other until Ella ran over and slapped them both, before running out and slamming the door behind her.

She was gone all night. Five couldn't bring herself to care.

Nine gets drunk most nights, coming back wasted and puking in the toilet.

"This isn't right," he slurs almost every time. "It's not meant to be this way. Stuff was meant to get better, not worse."

Whenever Ella sees him drunk, she yells profanities at him for hours on end. Ella despises them all now, even Marina and Eight, who she often says should have died instead of Crayton.

It's not really Ella's fault. She saw far too much far too young.

They all live in the same house, but they're all worlds away. Only Marina and Eight share a room, because only Marina and Eight get along. Five is jealous of their easy relationship, of the fact that they can find happiness when the rest of them are stuck in some sort of…aftermath that never seems to end.

Five feels disconnected, like this life doesn't really belong to her. Happiness is like an unknown emotion to her now, something she can't remember the feel of. She knows she's bitter, and doesn't really care.

They always thought about how to win the war, and not how to live afterwards.

Nine finds life pointless, she can tell. So does Six. They've both spent their whole lives training for the fight, and now that it's over, they don't know what to do with themselves. Their whole purpose has been destroyed now. They still have to reproduce, but most of them hate each other now. Only Marina and Eight would be able to, and their kids would somehow have to breed with their siblings. Not exactly an appealing thought.

She can't stand it. She can't stand it that their lives never get better.

None of them get jobs. They're not allowed to, or go to school. It was part of the agreement they had to make with the government to be able to stay on Earth. In fact, one of the agreements was not to leave the city of Manhattan without alerting them and getting permission. Otherwise they'd all be locked away in a prison for months.

They'd thought that would be alright, living together, but now they know differently. They hate each other, they _despise _each other. How are they meant to spend the rest of their lives together?

The Elders really couldn't have picked less compatible people.

Five feels lost. She feels like half of her was left on Lorien, or half of her was lost when Setrakus Ra destroyed their only way home.

Maybe, if things had been different, if the others had survived or if they had gotten back to Lorien, they'd get on and manage to resurrect their planet. But now that's just a wish, a dream in her mind that will never come true.

**So, please tell me what you think, and should I write something else? **


	2. 2 I may now be in the light

_**I've been asked to continue, so I'm going to. Please review and tell me what you think! **_

_**Full Chapter Title; I may now be in the light, but the darkness is still in my soul. **_

**Not everything is best after it's over. The war is over, they've won, but Nine is still missing something. Then he realises – he has no purpose. Winning has ruined who he is. **

"Hey Johnny boy!" he calls out, pushing into said Garde's room without knocking, ignoring the irritated look the blonde gives him. "You want to spar?"

"Go away, Nine," is all he replies with. "There's no point."

So Nine leaves.

That's basically all that's happened recently. He's wanted to train or spar with someone, but they've all blown him off, even Six and Five. There's just no point in it anymore, because they don't have a war to fight. They don't have to do anything like that.

But it's all he knows. He's spent his whole life waiting for a fight, a chance to prove himself, and when it finally came, one question still remains on his mind; _what now? _

He can hear John and Six arguing from down the hall. He shakes his head in weariness. Those two used to be in love, now they never shut up going on at each other. It's wearing them all out, Ella especially. The poor kid is only fourteen, and already she hates everyone she used to care about.

But no one's the way they used to be.

He stops training, panting. He's been doing it more and more every day, and does it even when no one else wants to do it with him, which is always.

It doesn't seem right, somehow. It doesn't seem right that they no longer have to worry about the Mogodorians, or the government, or if their legacies will be good in battle.

But their legacies are too strong, and they don't get enough opportunity to use them. See, what he remembers and the others don't is that if you don't use them regularly enough, they get too strong for you to handle, too uncontrollable and unpredictable. He knows that Eight is already becoming overwhelmed by knowledge of the future, too much of it and no Cepan to help him learn how to control it. There's been a flood, a boost in all their powers, and without their Cepan, they're all pretty much lost and grasping to control them.

They're all just reaching out for loose strands and trying to re-create what once was.

Once upon a time, they were happy. Then, they were hunted. But at least when they were hunted, they knew what was going on, why they had to do, what their purpose was. Now, they have nothing. They just stay in the house, or the city, and kind of…wait. But what they're waiting for, he has no idea.

The days pass without anything changing. Nine can still here John and Six screaming at each other from down the hall. Six often brings up that she wishes she'd never rescued him from Paradise, and he yells back that she should have been left to rot in Dulce. He swears he can hear a vase smash at one point, but can't be too sure.

He hears Ella interrupting to scream at them both at one point.

"I HATE YOU! I EFFIN' HATE YOU ALL! I **KNOW **YOU HATE EACH OTHER, BUT YOU BOTH NEED TO **SHUT UP **AND BE GRATEFUL THAT YOU'RE STILL ALIVE **AND **GOT THE CHANCE TO LIVE! I CAN'T EVEN EFFIN' LEAVE MANHATTAN ACCORDING TO THE GOVERNMENT! I'LL NEVER GET TO LIVE MY LIFE!"

A few seconds later a door slams and Ella is gone for three nights. She returns dirty and smelly and crying. None of them know where she's been, and none of them care. Five especially seems indifferent to everyone's behaviour. A lot of the time she just sits and stares at a blank wall. She isn't the same as she used to be, she isn't the girl that he fell in love with.

Eight and Marina go out more often than not, trying to escape the tense atmosphere in the house. It's a big house, but not nearly big enough for the likes of the people living there. The two that still have each other constantly avoid the others, the fully broken ones, and frequently get permission to leave Manhattan, first for day trips, then weeks, then months at a time. But eventually even their luck runs out, and the government tells them that, until further notice, they'll have to stay in Manhattan.

They come back to the house (not _home_, it can never be _home_) in an extremely bad mood, even worse than John's and Six's. They just lock themselves in their room and refuse to talk to anyone, just taking the offered food from Nine (who, believe or not, is the only one in the house to _care _about them still) and smile briefly, big bags under each of their eyes.

Eight finally invites Nine in, and they carefully explain the situation to him.

"Until the government says otherwise," Marina sighs. "All of us have to stay in the city, and the two of us have to seek permission to even leave the _house_.2

"It's killing me!" Eight suddenly explodes, which is _very _out of character for him. "It's killing being cooped up in this house with Five and Six and John and Ella when they've obviously gone crazy! You know what, I think _I'm _going crazy!"

None of them bother to deny it. They all are.

Nine trains more. He sweats every day, but notices that his muscles are getting bigger and he is getting stronger. He views this as a good thing, even though he doesn't _need _to be a soldier any more.

But you can't stop what you've started, and he's grown up to fight.

He starts going to gyms and stuff, exercising more and more. He's lost weight. He gets passes to go into sport centres and often goes on jogs and runs, especially when John and Six are fighting or Ella's yelling at them all.

This isn't right. They've been like this for a little under a year, and stuff was meant to improve.

He finds life completely pointless, and often goes out to churches and goes to see Buddhist priests, to see if there's anything he'll suddenly discover. But he always stumbles home without the answers he seeks, bottle of alchahol in his hand. Five always cleans him up, but with a kind of precision no human being (or Loric) should have.

Five scares him now. When he looks into her eyes, he sees no joy, no anger, not anything. She's completely emotionless. Or rather, he suspects, the few she has are fading as he fights.

He tries taking her out on dates and things. She doesn't smile once.

Ella yells at Five eventually, screaming at her that she's a cold, unfeeling robot. Nine secretly hopes that it will spark _something_, some kind of response from the girl he used to love, but no. Five just blinks once, and then that's it.

He tries to envision Sandor when it's night. Sandor would know what they're supposed to be doing. But Sandor isn't here. None of the Cepan are.

The Garde have won the fight, but now they're just left lost and confused.

He often goes out, looking for a fight. Most of the time he finds one. He refuses to stop until he's certain he's won, leaving the other person battered and bruised.

Those are the nights he comes back sober.

He's obsessed with finding out why he's still alive. He was always too careless – if he hadn't been Number Nine, if he had been One or Two, he would have been found and killed in record time.

Stuff gets worse. Six and John's fights get even worse, escalating until they are screaming their voices raw every time. They look for any excuse to be out the house when the other is in, and vice versa. They _hate _each other. They _can't stand _each other. Nine has never seen a hatred so intense. Not even his despise for the Mogodorians was this bad.

One day, one of them is going to kill the other.

He thinks he's mad. He's addicted to cage fighting now, always winning. Ella eventually finds out, and yells and yells at him. He stops after that, but something in him is crushed at the realisation he can't do it anymore.

This is making him fall apart. After the war, they were supposed to be satisfied, but he's certainly not. He doesn't think any of them are.

He tries to believe that all this, his obsession with purpose, everyone arguing, being trapped in Manhattan, all this will get better.

But he just can't bring himself to believe a lie.


	3. 3 I may have loved you in the darkness

_**Another chapter. I'm probably going to do one for each person, though not in number order, and then let you guys decide if you want me to write more or not. **_

_**Full Chapter Title; I may have loved you in the darkness, but that doesn't mean I love you in the light. **_

**Things aren't meant to be like this. They shouldn't be stuck in this endless conflict. She used to love him, but now Six can't stand the sight of him. **

"You're a bastard!" she screams at him, throat aching from shouting at him, day in day out. They used to just snap at each other for pointless things, but now the very thought of him fills her with revulsion. "You're a bastard and I hate you!"

"Well you're a b**ch!" he yells back, face screwed up in contempt. "I don't know why I even bothered _talking _to you!" She punches him. He punches her back. She picks up the vase full of flowers that Sarah got him, the ones he fixes every time they starts to wilt with his healing legacy. He eyes it warily.

With all her strength (which is a lot) she hurled the vase towards the wall, grinning as it smashed and the stems snapped.

John flinches, before turning back to her, a murderous look in his eyes. She almost winces, but instead stands straighter and raises her head slightly, trying to show that she's determined and not scared at all.

But instead of saying anything, he stares behind her. Ella is standing there, seething at them both. She yells at them louder than Six would have thought possible, before running out and slamming the door, making the entire hall shake as it rattles on its hinges.

It isn't _her _fault. It's _his_.

She was only ever a cheap replacement for Sarah. He used her, he _played _her. And it isn't fair – he always was caught up in his little Earth troubles and was completely reckless with his powers, and he got to be the heir to freaking _Pittacus Lore_, when he couldn't even handle himself in a fight without his human friends getting in the way.

Sure, Sam was her friend, and she might have had a crush on him, but she threw away any chance at a life with him because he wasn't _Loric_, and John was. She'd actually found herself falling for John, and while they were playing cat-and-mouse with the Mogodorians, she was _sure _he'd loved her back.

Things are different now. They aren't being hunted anymore, but somewhere along the line her feelings for him have changed. She now loathes him with her very being. She can't _stand _the very thought of him, his blonde hair and blue eyes and rugged good lucks that make her want to puke.

She storms away from his clenched fists, going into her room and making sure he can hear the click of the lock.

If Katerina was alive, she knew that her Cepan would hate John, despise him the way Six does. He's rubbish at fighting, gets distracted easily and is insistent that his personal affairs are more important than anyone else's.

She _hates _him.

Her whole life was dedicated towards fighting, and now she just feels lost. She knows nine feels the same way, and eventually she starts going and getting drunk with him, getting into bar fights. But nothing lasts forever, and when John finds out he breaks into her room and yells at her that she's so immature and a coward for turning to Nine and drinks, instead of facing her problems like a Loric.

This strikes a chord in her, because he _always _runs away from his problems and _never _faces them. She says as much, and for about an hour all they do is rant at each other.

She's glad Ella's out.

Six sees Marina and Eight going on trips out of Manhattan a lot. It makes her jealous that Eight is so _loyal _to Marina and vice versa. Neither of them were ever just replacements for some human chick.

One of the worst things about John is that everyone _adores _him. Everyone knows that he's even the government's favourite. The all-powerful one with the really good looks.

She's sick of him.

Straight after the war, they were fine together, and for quite a bit before, too. Things were so much simpler back then. He loved her and she loved him and they no longer had the Mogs to worry about and they were allowed to stay on Earth and they all got to live together.

It seemed like it would be alright, at first. They got along together, shared a room, stayed up late chatting. But when you spend too long around one person you get tired of them, and they soon found themselves snapping at each other. It turned into full-scale arguments, and soon even compliments turned into the worst fights.

In the end they decided to get separate rooms, but that turned into an argument over who should leave. Eventually Marina turned up and suggested that Six moved into the room next door to her own, which the female grudgingly agreed to. She knows John saw this as a personal victory, so she still loudly chatters to Marina about how _great _it is that they have rooms so close.

They often go out of each other's way to make their ex miserable. They yell at each other and wreck each other's rooms and when it's their turn to cook, they make sure not to make them a dish.

Six is finding it hard to control her powers. Her elemental ones especially. More than once she has accidently set something on fire with her mind, or heard a storm brewing outside in the midst of an argument with John. She wishes Katerina were here, but Katerina died years ago.

She wishes she were back on Lorien, when things were good and she could get along with John and her parents were still alive and well.

After the war, things weren't supposed to be this way. She was meant to have a better relationship with John, not a worse one. They shouldn't be acting this way, like they're in a game and the first one to try and make up is the loser.

They'd already tried, anyway. They'd gone out on dates, tried talking it out, all sorts. But nothing had worked. They'd just gotten even madder at each other and even more hateful.

She's falling apart, and John isn't helping. All of her crappy life has built up over the years and exploded at John, though it's not as if he doesn't deserve it.

Eventually she is sick of being in the same _city _as him, and asks the government if she can leave Manhattan. They reluctantly agree, but informing her that she's only allowed for a week and she'll have to have an agent watching her at all times.

"But don't let the others know," she is told. "As of right now, you're the only one allowed to leave Manhattan."

She agrees, because she has to get away and it makes her feel good to be keeping a secret from John.

She stays in West Virginia for a while, in a house the government lent to her. It's so peaceful without the others, and now she wishes she'd done this sooner. She goes for walks and masters her legacies better and wishes she never has to go back. If it was like this Marina and Eight every time they left, she can see why they did it so often.

But eventually she has to come back.

She comes in to John yelling his head off at her for disappearing like that, and Five just stares at her with blank eyes. She mentally shivers at that. Five is just plain _creepy _when she does that.

Eight and Marina are creeping up the stairs, and Eight catches her eye and winks when he sees her face.

Ella goes up to her at one point, shouting her head off about how effin' _selfish _Six is for not even telling them she was or what she was doing or what _was _she doing anyway?

Six doesn't answer that question.

Later, John tells her that he wishes she hadn't come back. He says he wishes she'd died.

This is just more proof that he hates her like he's never hated anything else. She _would _try and make things better, but that would make her feel like she's losing to him. Plus, she can barely cope with seeing him every day.

He yells at her a lot more after that, and vice versa. They try to avoid each other as much as possible. Just walking past each other triggers some kind of shouting match. Nine is getting sick of it, interrupting their fights to announce that something's going on that they _really should _see. Six yells at him for interrupting, before apologising and ignoring John's smug smile.

She wants to see Sam, but one of the agreements to stay on Earth was not to see Sam, Sarah, Mark, Malcolm, Devdan, Commander Sharma etc. All of their human friends are to be avoided at all costs.

In fact, Sam was told she was dead. Any humans with romantic relation to a Garde were told that their loved ones were dead. She'd been angry about that at first, but assumed she'd be alright with John by her side. But now she _despises _him and all she wants is to see Sam again.

But _John _keeps bringing up how alone she is.

When did everything get so bad with him? When did it get the she can't stand the sight of him? When did it get that he hates her so much to wish her dead?

She doesn't know, but all she can do is hope that things can get better.

But hope can only take you so far, and she's not delusional enough to believe it can fix an already broken relationship.


	4. 4 I may have believed in the light

_**Four's POV this time! Tell me who I should do next. **_

_**Full Chapter Summary; I may have believed in the light, but the darkness is just more powerful. **_

**It's an ending, but it's not a happy one. He was supposed to love her, to be with her forever, but now Four just wants everything to change. **

He wishes he never met her.

Really, he does wish that. She is _the _cockiest, most arrogant, hysterical, dramatic, cold, ice queen woman he was ever met. She walks around with her dark hair and stiff posture like she _owns _the place, like she owns _the world_. She's jealous and possessive, and really, he wonders, how could he have ever fallen for her?

John wants Sarah. Sweet, brave, kind Sarah who doesn't view herself as the queen of England, who doesn't screw her nose up in disgust every time he even walks past her. But Sarah, strong-hearted, beautiful, amazing Sarah thinks he's dead. She thinks he's gone and he's not coming back.

He isn't coming back for her, though. They'll all be locked away if he comes back for her.

All he has left from Sarah is the flowers she left at his 'grave', the ones the government took for him in an act of kindness. But then _Six _had to go and smash the vase, and break the stems. Even he couldn't fix that. A big metaphor for their relationship, really.

He wants Henri. He wants Sarah. He wants Sam. Hell, he even wants Mark.

He wants his _old life_.

A life without _her_. Six.

He hates her. He can't stand her. He _despises _her.

The others are alright, apart from Ella and Five, but Ella spends most of her time in the city or in her room. Five is like a freaking robot. She doesn't smile, frown, laugh cry or get angry. It's like she's dead inside. She's alive, but she isn't really living. None of them are, but Five is like…like her body's with him but her mind isn't.

The worst thing about his life miserable life with Six, is that he still love her.

Really, it's ridiculous. He despises her and everything to do with her. But through it all, him wishing she was gone, wanting someone else, arguing with her all the time…Through it all he still loves her deeply.

His Lumen is getting harder to control. His hands light up at random moments. In fact, _all _of his legacies are hard. Being the heir of Pittacus Lore isn't as great as it may seem, especially with the huge amount of power that comes with it.

The only reason he can supress most of it is because the government gave him an inhibitor to help. He was the only one in the house to receive it.

Eight comes to see him eventually, recommending that he somehow fixes things with Six. He makes John promise to do something about it, as if that will do anything. This house is full of distrust and broken promises.

Marina has a similar conversation with him the next day. The two of obviously been talking.

Months go by without anything changing. His arguments with Six get worse. Ella screams at them both. His room is a complete tip, with him neglecting to do anything but strike out at Six. Within five months, any romantic feelings for her have faded. He suspects she feels the same way. He wants Sarah. It's obvious she wants Sam.

Eventually, the one-year anniversary of them defeating the Mogodorians comes around. It's the one date they should celebrate, none of them remembering their actual birthdays. Thy all know that they're roughly twenty, twenty-one they just don't know when exactly they turned that age.

It's the anniversary of when they got peace, but none of them can bring themselves to celebrate. Alright, they got their ending, but it wasn't a happy one. It wasn't the ending they wanted. They were supposed to stay in love forever and ride off into the sunset on a ship until they reached Lorien.

They're all miserable the entire time, even Marina and Eight. The two of them finally get permission from the government to leave the house, and they're gone in a flash. Nine goes out and comes back drunk with a bloody nose. Five stares at a different blank wall than usual, which is odd for her. He doesn't know what Six does, and he doesn't care.

Ella spends the entire day screaming at them that while they saved her life, she's beginning to wish that they didn't. She says she wishes her papa were here, before bursting out crying and wailing and sobbing. John spends the rest of the day gently hugging Ella and whispering soothing words as she sobs into his shoulder.

He is now the only one that Ella will talk to in a nice way.

So, stuff is beginning to get better for the both of them. Ella has shouted less at the others, though she is by no means on good terms with them. They often shout at each other, him about Six and her about the others. But they'll always sit down afterwards and calmly talk it out.

She used to be like the little sister he never had, until the final battle and she shouted at the world. Now it's like she's his sibling again, and the trust is back between the two.

It's taken a year for things to get better, but at least they finally have. Better late than never.

He still argues with Six, just not as often. Don't get him wrong, he still hates her, but after spending more time with Ella he's had less time to make Six feel bad. He doesn't see Ella in a romantic way – just a platonic way.

The house atmosphere is slightly less tense now that a truce has been made between the two of them. A lot of the former awkwardness had been created by Ella, and he knows that the others can tell she's a lot happier than she was before.

She's finally moving on.

And, after a lot of work, he is too.

But he still misses Sarah, Sam and Henri. He wasn't even allowed to keep Bernie Kosar, though the Chimera was allowed to roam free in the wild.

He wants a job or something, but they're not allowed to get one. Or go to school. Or leave Manhattan without permission. They're barely allowed to do anything.

Nine still gets into fights, but he drinks a lot less. John is actually feeling pretty happy about this. Not the fight part, but certainly that he isn't coming back drunk and puking in the toilet. It's like it's a big sign, that things are going to get better and things are finally turning around for them.

It's always darkest before dawn.

But like all good things, they soon come to an end.

He's walking past Ella in the hallway when she suddenly whirls around and spits in his face. He blinks in surprise. Weren't things getting better with her?

"I hate you!" she screams at him, eyes screwed up with tears and red in the face. "I effin' hate you! You're a liar! You're big fat liar and you break all your promises and you're a filthy b**ch and I HATE YOU!"

The others have crowed round to see what's going on. She turns to them and slaps the closest person, which happens to be Six (John's actually quite pleased about this,) so hard that he's surprised he head doesn't fall off her shoulders. Then Ella wails something incomprehensible and runs out the door, slamming it as she used to do so often.

John still doesn't know what he did wrong.

Marina bites her lip and goes after Ella, Eight quick on her heels. Six stares after with sad eyes. Five is the only one unaffected, staring at the door with indifferent eyes before tonelessly announcing that she's 'going to bed', though she's probably just going to stare at the ceiling.

Nine storms out after the other three, but John doesn't think he's going to hunt them down.

And he's right. After, Nine will come back drunk, his first bottle of alchahol he's consumed for two months.

It leaves him and Six alone in the hallway. She stares at him for a second, before her nostrils flare like a bull's and she begins to fume.

"What did you do?" she demands, and before waiting for an answer she storms off with disgust clearly written all over her face.

He blinks again. Six blames him for everything, even things that aren't his fault. Or, at least, if he is at fault, she automatically assumes that he knows why, or has done it on purpose.

But, any goodness the house had is gone now.

He wonders if he'd known that good things don't last forever. But, maybe bad things don't either. But bad went to good and bounced back again, so maybe bad things stick around, whereas good just fade away.

**I didn't think that this chapter was as good as the other ones, but I had a bit of trouble writing John! So...What do you think? Should I do Marina next, or someone else? What should Ella's problem be? **

**And****, I'm planning on having a happy ending, but probably dragged out with more chapters from the other Garde's POV again. Any suggestions on how I should fix things with them? **

**Please REVIEW! **


	5. 5 I may have clung to you in the dark

_**Thanks for all the reviews! I have a clearer idea on how to get them working together now, and this chapter was a bit easier to write, as Marina isn't meant to be as bitter as the others I've written. Sorry for not updating yesterday, but I had to go clothes shopping with my mum (who nagged me the WHOLE TIME) and my sister (who was alright, but had a go at me for being 'too friendly and chirpy'.) **_

_**Full Chapter Title; I may have clung to you in the dark, but that doesn't mean I'll let go of you in the light. **_

**They shouldn't be here – trapped with these broken people. She knows that have to get out of here, before they become broken too, but Seven just can't bring herself to leave. **

The war changed them both.

She's more confident, for instance, more outspoken and ready to fight for what she believes in. he's the opposite. He's become more quiet, withdrawn. He isn't as playful as he used to be – much more serious.

She still loves him, though.

They grow even closer after the war, if anything. They don't argue, not like John and Six. And they don't start avoiding each other like Five and Nine. They share a room, and stay up late discussing their opinions on TV shows and novels. Because, really, without being able to get jobs or go to school, what else is there to do?

Ella is spiralling out of control. She yelled at them both, saying that she wishes they'd died instead of Crayton. Marina feels furious at that, because it isn't her fault Crayton died, nor is it Eight's. It's the Mogodorians'.

After she eventually snaps at Ella and calls her a brat, she realises what's happening to her. The others in the house are broken, and they're breaking her, too. She doesn't want to break. She has to stay strong, for herself and Eight.

She is the first person in the house to request a leave of Manhattan. The government approves, granting her and Eight flight tickets to Barcelona, and escorting them personally with an agent by their side. They even get a house to stay in that the government has rented out for them, one that's quite modern and helps them keep cool in the hot weather.

They spend most days on the beach, running into the sea and just tanning sometimes. But they do go and see the Gaudi things, and explore the city. It's nice to get out the house, away from the broken people the live there, and even the agent stalking them the whole time can't dampen her mood.

But eventually they have to go back to Manhattan.

They open the door to Six and John screaming at each other, voices hoarse. The fury is written plain on their faces, and she feels hopeless despair at the fact that she can't fix their relationship, no matter how hard she tries. And she does. She tries talking to both of them, and convinces Eight to do the same, but her words just fall on deaf ears. The two are just so caught up in their hate that it doesn't occur to them that there might be something else.

She tries leaving permanently several times, asking the government if her and Eight can transfer to a less 'secure' house, because, surely, the Loric don't all need to be contained together anymore. But each time her appeal is denied, on the basis that it would be too hard to keep track of the Loric if they all live in separate homes.

She almost just ups and leaves anyway often, but always decides against it. She doesn't have the heart to leave the people who need saving so badly.

They go to Paris next. They see the Mona Lisa, go up the Eiffel Tower, even go on double-decker trains. The get boat rides down the Seine, the river that runs through Paris. It's beautiful at night, with the city lit up and the stars twinkling above them. They go on picnics, taking the classic cheese and wine. They stroll through rose gardens, eating ice cream and her laughing when he gets chocolate flavour on his nose. They bring the camera they took to Barcelona, and begin a scrapbook. It's perfect.

But perfection doesn't last forever. The have to go back to broken house.

When they come back this time, Nine is drunk and slurring about how 'this isn't right'. Five is cleaning him up with disinterest. Ever since the end of the war, Five has been like that. Cold, detached, like she just doesn't care about anything anymore. She probably doesn't. Just another broken number.

Six is now in the room next to theirs, and Marina can hear her muttering at night about how much she hates John. Even in her sleep, she despises him.

So they get permission to leave again, once again with an agent on their tail the whole time. They visit London this time, bringing the camera and the scrapbook, telling themselves that they'll visit all the famous cities. The sail down the Thames, catch the underground and visit the tower, all for free, and with their own home to get back to. Sometimes it's good being an alien on Earth – they get special privileges.

They even visit M&M World, where everything is ridiculously expensive, so they request money from the government, and they are given a lot. It's wonderful, and they take more pictures, working late into the night on the scrapbook.

They don't want to go back, but it isn't their choice.

They come back to find that Ella is no longer in the house, hasn't been for a few days. Though she feels bad about it, Marina knows that she isn't worried. She's glad. That's one less broken person to deal with.

They go to Amsterdam next. It's raining the whole time they're there, but they still get chips in cones and go to Madame Tasaude's and cycle around (because the Dutch people there are obsessed with bikes) and go to the Van Gogh Museum, which isn't actually just about Van Gogh paintings, but it's still good.

They even go to the Anne Frank Museum, their agent 'escort' allowing them to cut the queue and go straight inside. She feels sorry for the poor girl, who also was stuck in a house with people that she didn't want to be with. But at least they weren't broken, like Five and Six and Ella and the others.

They return with an updated scrapbook. John is yelling at Six. Apparently she's been drinking and going out to fight with Nine. She sighs. They only stay for a week before heading off to Sydney.

They stay here for two months. They've been gradually going away for longer, requesting to get away from the house and the broken people. They spend many days just relaxing here, though they do go out a lot. It's wonderful, and perfect and she wishes that she doesn't have to go back.

As soon as they return, the government tells them that they've been away too much. They can't leave Manhattan, and they have to get permission to even leave the house.

They confess to Nine. He smiles grimly, but doesn't try to tell them that it'll all be alright. None of them are stupid enough to believe that.

The scrapbook is thrown under the bed and left in the dark to rot.

The anniversary comes around, months after. That's months of being cooped up in the house. They're miserable at first. They're together, but neither of them tries to comfort the other.

They finally get permission to leave the house. Within seconds, they've brought the scrapbook out and are racing outside with the camera, ready to see the Empire State Building. It's the happiest she's felt since Sydney.

When they return, things have, for once, gotten better. John and Ella seem to have struck up some sort of friendship, and both have improved. She can hear Six and he arguing a lot less, and Ella's temper has died down a bit. Things are improving.

Then she hears things flare up again, and she has to run after Ella.

She stares at the girl in front of her, this broken, unhappy girl, and wonders how she can possibly fix her.

By rights, it should be her doing all the fixing, mending, gluing things back together. She is the healer, after all. But she's only good with physical wounds, literal harm. When someone is broken in the mind, though…she has no idea how she's meant to fix it.

Like with Eight, she knows he's been overcrowded with knowledge lately. She often finds him curled up on himself, rocking back and forth and muttering incoherent things. All she can do is offer comfort and some form of distraction, offering him to talk about it, even though he always refuses and smiles weakly at her.

Ella stands in front of her, soaked by rain and breathing heavily. It's only because of her legacy that Marina can see her so clearly in the dark, the younger girl's hair matted down with water and her eyes rimmed with red. She guesses that Eight is having difficulty seeing the fourteen-year-old, and Ella them.

She's almost left permanently several times, just wanted to take off and bring Eight with her. She's gotten as far as packing her clothes a lot, but then heard some of the others getting along and deciding not to. She's been wanting to go even less as of lately, with John finally reaching out to Ella and beginning to fix her.

She knows that they should have left long ago. They are trapped, surrounded by broken people in a broken home with broken memories in their minds. They need to leave before they become broken, too.

But she can't just abandon the others like that. Some part of her must know that they are hopeless, but another part argues that she might as well try.

So this is her. Trying.

"Ella?" she asks, quietly, hesitantly. "Are you alright?" Okay, so that was one of the worst questions that she could possibly have asked. Ella is obviously not alright. The Garde seems to agree, as Marina can see her look in her direction incredulously, blinking lots to get the rain out of her eyelashes.

"I would have been," she says loudly, rubbing her cheeks that have tears streaking down them. It might be raining, but she can tell that Ella is crying. "If John hadn't lied!"

"Lied about what, Ella?" she questions gently, grabbing Eight's hand and slowly beginning to approach the younger girl. "What did John lie about?"

"EVERYTHING!" she screams, wailing louder than Marina would have thought possible. "He said that things would be alright, and that Crayton didn't blame me for his death, and you all didn't mind that I was so horrible to you, but he EFFIN' LIED!" She says it getting gradually louder, until she is shouting at the end. Marina blinks, before noting that she is right next to the younger girl now.

Tentively, she reaches out and envelops Ella in a hug, wrapping her arms round the auburn-haired girl and pulling her close. Eight stands back a bit, slipping his hand out of hers as Ella leans into the gentle embrace and sobs into Marina's chest, sniffling in her hair.

"He didn't lie, El," she eventually mutters, stroking her hair softly, the way a mother or older sister would. "He was telling the truth. We all love you, and Crayton adored you. He would never blame you."

"But…" Ella sniffles, pulling loose of Marina's grip. "I keep seeing him, when I'm dreaming and when I'm awake." She pauses, shuffling nervously and burying her face in her hands. "I think I'm going crazy." She says it quietly, and the sound is muffled by her hands, but it's loud enough for the healer.

Careful not to startle her, Number Seven wraps an arm round her shoulders, gentler when she freezes up under the grip, and begins to guide the younger girl back towards the house, taking Eight's hand again and bringing him with them.

"Let's get you inside, 'ey?" she says in the way Adelina had year ago, when they first arrived at the orphanage and she didn't move from the cold. She hadn't realised back then that they were basically walking into a safe haven, and she has a feeling that Ella doesn't realise that now.

They walk inside together, the three of them, all connected, and it's like it's a sign that things will improve.

And they do. John and Six are still mad at each other, yelling and even throwing thing at each other, and Nine has slipped back into his drinking habits, but Ella has made a definite improvement. She still cries at times, and claims to see Crayton screaming at her, and gets mad when they don't believe her, but her drawings of death have stopped, and she is capable of getting along with most of them.

The only person unaffected by Ella's change of heart is Five, the one Ella gets mad at the most. Five is still robotic and cold, even more so than before the war. It's always worried Marina, how someone can just be so unfeeling, but she's never known what she's supposed to do about it.

Months go by, and things are still going well. But she can swear she's seen John curl up on himself sometimes, muttering about Sarah, Sam and Henri. She wants to say something, but every time she thinks of something to say, he seems to calm himself down. And he's not the only one. Nine mutters about Sandor when he's sober, and screams about him when he's drunk. Six's eyes go funny sometimes, like they're welling up with tears, but Marina has never seen Six cry.

Even Five shows an emotion occasionally, grief clearly etched onto her face or sorrow written all over the way she talks, but it's hard to tell with Five.

Whatever's going on, her and Eight seem unaffected. They've got permission from the government to go out and dine with each other, so they do that every mealtime. He says that he's noticed their strange behaviour, too.

One thing is clear. Something is wrong, and she doesn't know how to fix it.

**_Wow, this chapter is so long. That's becuase I wrote the bit about Ella in the rain first, then went back and added all the stuff about the holidays. The length is to make up for not updating yesterday. _**


	6. 6 I may be fully in the light

_**Sorry for not updating! I just got caught up with loads of other stuff and never had time to write the chapter until now! **_

_**Full Chapter Title; I may be fully in the light, but the light has it's own darkness. **_

**They can't control their legacies. He can't control his legacies. His mind is being overwhelmed by knowledge and Eight can barely get a thought in of his own. **

_There will be a terrorist attack on the twenty seventh of June people will scream buses will crash a taxi will hold a bomb a group will take responsibility the next day a little girl screams and cries and "mama!" and everyone is ignoring her and police are running about and "Mama!" and sirens are blaring and it's being cordoned off and "MAMA!" and a woman is sobbing as she is loaded into an ambulance and "__**MAMA!**__" _

The plate he is holding in his hands slips out and smashes against the tiled kitchen floor.

Nine, Ella and Marina, the only other people in the room, turn to look at him immediately. He can feel their gazes boring into his head, but can't bring himself to look them in the faces. Instead he just watches the plate on the floor, the cracks decorating its surface. Well, the surface still together, that is.

"I'm fine," he mumbles, before any of them can ask, and shuffles out, ignoring the broken plate on the floor, smashed to pieces.

He's always known things, as part of his sixth sense legacy (extra sensory perception, it's apparently called.) He's always been grateful, with it allowing him to know that Marina was coming and that they would find Six.

But it's been worse than usual lately. His head has been crammed with knowledge, knowledge he doesn't want, and he knows exactly why.

There's something in the water.

He's suspected ever since they first were moved into the house by the government, a year ago, that their problems weren't over. The knowledge he received a month ago confirmed his suspicions. He knows what's wrong, what's affecting them all, though the others clearly have no clue.

It's started to finally affect Marina, he knows. She's started seeing Adelina, Hector, all the girls from the orphanage.

He himself sees Reynolds and Lola, amongst other people. He ignores them, knowing that they're not real. They're not even supposed to be there. They're a side-effect.

But it's bothering him. None of the others are like they used to be, but just when they start to recover, they start having 'delusions'.

Well, he plans to fix that.

In the night, he makes sure everyone is asleep, even going as far as to lock their rooms just in case they aren't, before sneaking out of Marina's embrace and going outside.

He knows that the government will be on his tail as he walks away from the house. They made it clear that he and Marina could only go in a certain part of the city, the part he is currently walking away from. It's the only way to properly grasp their attention. They probably wouldn't even listen to him otherwise.

He stops when he reaches a river, sitting down on the edge and waiting for them to arrive. Sure enough, just five minutes later, an official government car parks behind him and General Stevens, the member that has the most contact with the Garde, sits beside him.

"You planning on going somewhere?" he asks, taking in Eight's appearance. He knows he looks awful, especially at this time of night, but his mind is racing and thoughts are pounding in his ears and he really couldn't care less about how he looks right now.

He shakes his head slowly, a ghost of a grim smile creeping onto his face.

"Just to see one of your doctors," he says, looking up at the guy. Stevens is frowning in the light from the headlights, a frown that matches the one John wears when Six comes into a room he's already in. "It's the drug, you see. The one you've been putting in the water."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Stevens says, making Eight roll his eyes. It's a barefaced lie and both of them know it.

"Yes you do. The drug you've been putting in the water ever since we moved in. I've known about it for a while now, but it wasn't really doing any harm, so I didn't bother saying anything." Stevens is shifting uncomfortably now. Eight smirks for a second. Good.

"Why are you saying something now, then?" the government agent asks, climbing to his feet, watching as Eight does the same. The Garde sighs and closes his eyes for a moment, counting to ten to keep himself calm, before opening his eyes to face Stevens.

"Because now it_ is_ causing harm. All of us are experiencing hallucinations, and…" He trails off, gulping. "And I can't put up with the voices anymore."

He's driven to a medical facility, the one they sometimes get check-ups from. He explains his situation, with doctors and scientists listening intently. They finally agree to slowly ease the Garde off the drug, as long as he undergoes an examination to check that he is not making this up.

He agrees, simply because they might be able to help supress the constant knowledge.

So he has several tests and a brain scan, all of which seem pointless to him, but the government insists.

After the scan, the doctor doing it begins to speak to Agent Stevens in a hushed tone, handing him a sheet of results. The government member nods wearily, before approaching Eight, who is sitting on a chair alone.

"I'm afraid I have some bad news," he says, and isn't _that_ a great conversation starter?

Eight watches him expectantly, blinking when he is handed the sheet and freezing at the image sat on there.

"When we heightened your legacies, we had no idea just how powerful certain ones would get. For the others, from what you've told us, they are just ones that have little or no effect on the Garde themselves. For example, Number Six's weather-manipulation does not harm her in any way. But you…your brain has basically gone into overdrive, desperately trying to find space it does not have to cram all the information it's been receiving. This has had a big effect on you, one we're not sure is possible with humans, and wouldn't have been possible for your race had we not boosted your legacies." Really, this explanation is unnecessary. He can see all he needs to know from the sheet in front of him. "Your brain…the amount of knowledge has piled up, and paired with how hard it's been working…I'm sorry, but you have a brain tumour."

He just nods, not trusting himself to speak without being sick. It makes sense really, with the Loric's biology being so similar to humans'. And it isn't completely unexpected, with all the headaches he's been getting recently.

"Will Marina be able to heal me?" he asks after an eternity of silence, once the bile has gone from his throat. Stevens clears his throat uncomfortably, and that's enough of an answer to be honest.

"Number Seven's healing ability is…very peculiar when it comes to what it can heal. As you are probably aware, she allowed herself to undergo a series of tests to see what she could and could not heal. I'm sorry, I am very, very sorry, but tumours are not among them. To cure it, she would have to be able to remove it, and her healing legacy doesn't allow her to do that."

He is sick this time, all over the floor. He can tell that Stevens doesn't really blame him. The man looks like he's about to be sick himself.

He gets drunk that night, coming back to find the others staring at him angrily, having used their telekinesis to unlock their doors. He doesn't give them an explanation, doesn't tell them about the tumour, instead just going into his own bedroom and falling asleep on the bed. He can sense Marina watching him sadly from the doorway, but, as he drifts off, can't bring himself to care.

The government gave him a sedative, though it does little to stop the constant information being fed to his brain.

He's quieter than usual the next few days, feeling sick every time he thinks about that_ thing_ in his brain. He doesn't want the others to know, doesn't want them to be feeling as sick as he does.

It isn't fair, really. He survives Mogodorians and Pikens and Krauls and a sword through his shoulder, only to be stopped by a brain tumour, something he can't even see because it's lodged in his head somewhere.

At least the government has stopped drugging the others.

He can tell the others have noticed his change in demeanour, and are all worried about him, especially Marina in particular. He still doesn't tell them – why should he? They'll all worry, and he wants his last days to be as nice and normal as possible.

The government seems to sympathise him, as they finally give him and Marina permission to leave to visit New Delhi, the place he used to live in. it's amazing there, with bright lights and people dancing on the streets and, for a while, he forgets that there's something deadlier than a thousand Mogodorians living in his brain.

Because, even when the others think that things are better, he knows that they're not. If anything, they've gotten worse.

He knows he'll have to tell them eventually, but every time he tries, his throat closes up and his head spins and bile rises in his mouth and he just can't bring himself to tell them those two simple words;_ "I'm dying." _

And, it would just be _so easy _to keep it a secret from them, to wait until after he's gone and leave it to the government to break the news.

Because, really, how is he supposed to tell those who have already lost so much that they're going to lose him, too?

_**Sorry for having it so depressing! I just had this idea and had to get it out! I'm not sure whether to have Eight get better or not...review and tell me? **_

_**And, like I said, sorry for having it so depressing, but I've always been better at writing morbid stuff. **_

_**I'm going to London for a while, so if I don't update that's why. **_


	7. 7 I may be partially in the darkness

_**SO sorry for not updating! I'm in the middle of a really personal dilemma that's been confusing me so much and I only got round to writing most of the chapter today! **_

_**Full Chapter Title; I may be partially in the darkness, but that doesn't stop me from trying to stay in the light. **_

**Things get better, then they get worse, then they get better again. It's a cycle, one she is sick of, but Ten just doesn't know how to fix it. **

The war is over, they've won, but Ella just can't help but be angry. They all survived, so why didn't Crayton? It just isn't fair.

The new house is nice, but the others are all planning on sharing rooms with their partners. She has no one. She lies in bed alone, knowing that the others are all with each other, not lonely like her.

And they don't even realise what they have. Especially John and Six, who start arguing with each other to the point that they're screaming their voices raw, clawing at the weak bits they knows the other has. It's pathetic, she thinks, watching them yelling over the simplest things. It's pathetic that they hate each other so much when they clearly are in love.

Five is horrible as well, even worse than the others. She doesn't use the emotions they all know she has, instead opting to wear a blank mask the whole time. It fuels Ella with anger, knowing that this girl has true love and cool powers to be envious of and she really can't even be bothered to appreciate the fact.

At least Ella appreciates the fact that she's_ alive_. She just doesn't appreciate the fact that her papa isn't.

The others have virtually forgotten about her, she can tell.

She wants to go to school, get a proper education and eventually a job. She wants to live her life, not be cooped up in a place too unfriendly to be called 'home'.

Gone is the child-like innocence she used to have.

She gets angry. Like,_ really_ angry. She gets angry at John and Six for arguing, at Five for being so cold, at Nine for cage-fighting (really, _cage-fighting_), even at Marina and Eight for trying to pretend that the others don't exist.

She's living in a house with six other people, but she's alone.

She goes out at night sometimes, stays away for up to a week. She just kind of wanders around, reflecting on how pathetic her life is, filled with emptiness and anger.

She often comes back crying.

Ella ends up going to anger management classes, talking about how cross she is at her 'cousins' and how she wishes her life was the way it used to be. She meets no judging look, no condescending words. Just acceptance and understanding.

It's nice.

She still gets mad at the others, though. Marina and Eight are virtually inseparable, taking off without notice and coming back laughing, before seeing her and their smiles fade. John and Six can't stop arguing, fighting every second of every day. She screams at them to shut up, but they just completely ignore her. Nine goes all self-destructive. Five might as well be dead with the fact that she isn't really living. None of them are.

When the anniversary comes around, stuff actually begins to improve. She finds someone else who wants their old life, her and John bonding. The tense atmosphere finally lifts. Things are getting better.

She begins to see Crayton. He haunts her dreams and appears in front of her, yelling at her for not being good enough to save him.

"You're worthless, you know that?" he says one day, as she cries silently to herself. "So pathetic. No wonder the others ignored you. No wonder Marina called you a selfish brat. It's true."

She finally snaps, yelling at John and running out the house. Things are worse then, but Marina and Eight come after her and it gets better again.

She still sees Crayton. She still has nightmares. But she can cope.

It's like a cycle. Things are alright, then something happens and they're not, and something else happens and they are, and so on and so on.

She wants so badly for it to be good all the time, but bad just seems to be magnetically drawn towards them. She hates it.

Eight smashes a plate eventually, a far-off look on his face. He leaves before Ella can do anything. Nine frowns. Marina moves to go after her boyfriend, but Ella stops her.

"Let him calm down," she says, and since when was she good at giving advice? "If he wants to talk about it, he'll come to you. We just have to wait."

He does come back, but he doesn't talk about it.

The time she wakes up to find herself locked in is one of the scariest in her life. She bangs on her door loudly, the panic taking control and preventing her from simply using telekinesis. The others eventually open the door, and she's never been so thankful to get away from Crayton and his cruel comments.

Eight has gone somewhere and locked them all in their rooms. Luckily, the others had managed to remain calm and opened their own doors. But that still leaves the question of where Eight's gone.

He returns eventually, drunk out of his mind, refusing to meet any of their eyes.

He's different after that. More quiet, withdrawn, even more so than he was straight after the war. He looks at them sadly from time to time, opening his mouth to speak but seeming unable to get the words out.

He leaves to New Delhi with Marina, coming back even more depressed.

"Ella?" he eventually says, when the others have gone out somewhere and it's just the two of them. "Do you…Can you help me with something?"

"What?" she asks, flipping through the channels on the TV with disinterest. "Have you and Marina had an argument?" He shakes his head hesitantly.

"No, no. Nothing like that. It's just…" He trails off. She sits up. Something is very wrong.

"What is it?"

"I-" he seems to be struggling to get the words out. "I…" He sighs, shoulders slumping in defeat. "I have a brain tumour."

She gasps sharply, wondering if this is some kind of sick joke. But one look in his eyes and she can see that he's deadly serious.

Things have gotten worse again.

"You can't tell Marina," is the first thing she says. "She'll lose it."

"I know," he says, looking sick. "I just…the government are planning on seeing if there's a way to remove it. I don't want to go alone. And, you're now the only one in the house that knows, so…"

She knows what he's going to say before he does.

"Yes," Ella answers. "Yes, I'll come with you."

* * *

The room is stuffy – it's a hot day without air-conditioning, and the windows seem jammed shut. Ella sits next to Eight, whose leg bounces up and down nervously. She feels angry at the government. How dare they drug their water, enhance their abilities without their consent? It has caused a brain tumour, and they didn't even think to tell them.

"There is a chance of removal," the doctor finally tells them, handing over a sheet. "We've made an appointment for three weeks' time. I'm sorry, but that's the soonest we could get you. You're lucky you're not waiting three_ months_."

Ella nods at the Asian woman as she stands up.

"Thanks. But…should we tell our friends?"

"I'd suggest that, yes, you do. If the removal isn't successful, you'll want them to know."

So, when they get home, they tell Nine.

Nine wants to leap up and attack the government, but Ella yells at him for being so ridiculous. It's technically only because of the government that Eight is getting it 'removed' so soon.

Ella feels angry every time she thinks about the fact that the tumour might not be removed. That's all she seems to have been since the end of the war – angry. This anger has consumed her very being and taken control of her. For a while it seemed to be the only thing that she was. Just angry.

They tell Five. And, for the first time in a year, Five begins to cry.

And Ella feels angry, because it's taken something terrible like this to make them snap out of it.

**_Thanks_****_ for reading! I'm going away for a bit so I might not update soon but to all the people who've been reading since Chapter One and are still checking for updates...THANK YOU! _**


	8. 8 I may be consumed by the darkness

_**I'm not sure about anywhere else, but in England the Fall of Five comes out tomorrow (TOMORROW!) I wanted to finish this before it does. **_

_**So, this chapter just sort of wraps things up. And, thank you for all the people who had to wait so long for the last two chapters. I never gave up on this story - I just got held back a bit. This chapter is so much shorter and I'm sorry, but... **_

_**Full Chapter Title - I may be consumed by the darkness, but that doesn't mean I'll stay that way forever. **_

**She hasn't felt for so long, it's almost scary to feel again. And she wishes that she couldn't feel because one of them could die and she can't do anything about it. **

When they tell her about the brain tumour, it's the first time that she feels…something.

Just a small spark, a small flicker of emotion, but it's there.

And she begins to cry. Because even when Adam died she didn't feel a twinge of sadness and when Ella would yell at them she sat and stared and now her safety has been compromised and –

And it's scary.

But, at the same time, it's ever so nice.

Here, in this house, there is something unspoken. The thing that they all think about, the prospect of losing one of their own. And slowly, not even abruptly.

They can't even tell Marina. They all know that it would break her.

In general the six of them do a rather good job of keeping it to themselves. John and Six finally put aside their differences to talk to the government about what the operation will do, signing all the paperwork and consent forms.

Ella goes out of her way to make things easier for Eight. She covers for him when he acts a bit funny and helps him do the forms _he_ has to fill in and when his brain goes into information overload because the sedative has worn off.

Nine, surprisingly, is the one to fetch all the medication. It's been specially created to fit Loric physiology, so there shouldn't be any negative side-affects.

So that leaves Five to deal with Marina.

"Why's everyone acting really strange?" Number Seven asks her one day, when the two of them are sitting alone on the couch.

"In what way?"

Marina looks uncomfortable.

"Well, not that I'm complaining or anything, but you all seem…better. Like you were before the war. Determined."

Oh. So, Marina's noticed the change, then.

"We've just decided to get our act together. We weren't really living."

It's partially the truth, anyway.

"Oh. Okay."

It goes on this way for two weeks, when they only have one week left before the operation.

But then one day Marina storms with a look of fury written across her face.

"Why didn't you_ tell_ me?" she demands, eyes burning with anger. She holds up the medications that Eight has been taking. "You thought that I wouldn't find these, and maybe ask the government _what they were for?!_"

She looked at them all incredulously. Five stood up.

"We didn't want you to get hurt."

"…Fine," Marina says at long last, pursing her lips. "I'll forgive you. If you let me wait for you."

So they do.

* * *

One week later, and one of the doctors comes out of the operation room.

"He's going to be alright," she says.

And it's like a bit metaphor._ He's_ going to be alright, so_ they're_ going to be alright._ Everything_ is going to be alright.

"It's come to our attention," General Stevens says to the six of them later, when Eight is getting examined by the doctors, just to check that his brain tumour is actually gone. "That we haven't been treating you like proper civilians. More like criminals, and yet you have never proved to be a threat to the United States. You are all like humans in every way except your powers. We forgot that."

He smiles grimly.

"You will all be given a certain amount of money. Enough for you to buy a house wherever you want and move there, as long as you tell us where you're going. We've created back-stories for all you, but you get to choose your names. You will be allowed to see each other whenever you wish. You will be allowed to attend school, Ella, and the others will be able to do your GCSEs here, A-levels in college some of you, and all of you can go to university, get your degree. You will be allowed proper, human lives."

Ella has to stay with a member of the government, still classing as a minor, but she can choose where to go. She begins to attend a small high school in Wales.

Surprisingly, John and Six both move back to West Virginia, where they manage to rekindle their romance and become friends with all the people there.

Eight makes a full recovery and spends all his time with Marina, both of which go to New Delhi for three months, then Sydney, then Paris. They keep the scrapbook, moving all around the world together.

Nine and Five manage to make their relationship work, somehow. They both stay in Chicago at Nine's penthouse.

They all meet up after a year, exchanging pleasantries and telling each other about where they've been, what they've been doing.

And, for the first time since the war ended, Five feels happy.

_**So...a happy ending. All's well that ends well. After seven really depressing chapter, the Garde finally get a happy ending. **_

_**THANK YOU FOR READING! PLEASE REVIEW! **_


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